Positive Intent

I like to assume positive intent. I stray away from assuming people are all bad (or all good for that matter) and instead hope that people will do the right thing. I don’t have a jaded view of the world where I inherently think people are out to make your life unnecessarily difficult or only care about their own personal gain. I’ll give people the benefit of the doubt and assume something was an oversight instead of malicious intent. 

At times, Kris has to remind me that just because that’s how I view the world, not everyone will act accordingly. I don’t like assuming that people really are selfish beings that only care about themselves. He and I will be talking about a subject and I might start down a path where I’m assuming positive intent and he always says, “You’re assuming way too much positive intent.”

I guess you could say I’m a true Southern Belle. I’m not trying to take advantage of or be mean to people I cross paths with on a daily basis. In fact, that’s the furthest from the truth. I want to inspire, help, protect, and overall be an addition to someone’s life, not a subtraction. While I do have my moments when I’m frustrated, impatient, or upset, I try not to take my feelings out on those around me. 

I’ve had to learn to keep a check on that, especially after getting married. Because our significant others are literally always with us, it’s easy to make them the target of our negative emotions when in reality, we never should channel that energy in their direction. Being conscientious of our triggers, warning signs, and things we can do to deescalate the situation makes all the difference and prevents our loved ones from growing resentful of our negative behavior. It definitely takes hard work, dedication, and self-awareness to get to a point where you’re not bottling things in but you’re also not exploding. 

There’s so much evil out there in the world that I choose to see the good in people. That typically comes through understanding and learning empathy. Just because someone is in a different situation from you, doesn’t mean you should pity them or hold yourself above them. Neither does it mean you know their whole life story or what’s best for them. Listening to people and actually taking into account what they want is the most valuable thing we can do to grow our interpersonal relationships and ensure we are bringing more happiness than we are sucking away. 

Signed, 

Jessica Marie