The Fear of What If

Fear definitely has a way of holding you back if you let it. It can make you second guess yourself and what you know is right. It can also paralyze you from making any decisions or following your heart/passions. 

There are so many ideas I have that get pummeled by the fear of what if. What if I fail? What if my idea is stupid? What if I’m wasting my time? What if I actually succeed? What if this venture starts taking up too much of my time? What if no one cares? 

I have these thoughts every day that I sit down and write a post mainly because I feel that I am speaking into a vacuum. I haven’t done any promotion for it on social media (even though I definitely need to). I haven’t told any of my close friends about my venture and I definitely haven’t mentioned it to any of my family. I’m okay with staying anonymous. 

I have to get over my what if’s before I share my project with the world. Because who knows? Someone might resonate with my musings and really love my content. Then again, someone might actually hate it (we don’t pay attention to those thoughts/people). I’m focusing on writing because it makes me happy and brings me real joy instead of the popularity, monetary gain, or notoriety it may bring. 

I don’t have a fear of heights, or spiders, or anything of that sort but it’s those tiny irrational fears living between my ears that sometimes trip me up. I end up ruminating way too long on things instead of just doing them and hoping for a good result. 

For example, I have an idea to offer notebooks as an item for sale. I’ve designed one, priced out how much it costs to produce it, and wrote a primitive description, but I haven’t listed it on my website or Facebook to get real offers. Similarly, I have an idea to get into the digital goods arena where I design a planner or notebook, upload the PDF to Etsy or my website, and the goods are delivered as soon as a customer makes a purchase. Sounds like a great idea, but I haven’t made any progress on actually doing it. Those questions - What’s going to make my product different? What’s going to make people purchase mine over the ones already on the market? - keep holding me back from sitting down and actually making the products available. 

Of course, fear on one hand is good. It keeps us safe when we’re in risky situations. It reminds us that we are indeed human and that we can’t protect ourselves against our environment like animals can. It’s also a healthy warning alarm to get our attention. 

On the flip side, fear hinders us from confronting things and situations that help us grow. It makes us long for our comfort zone instead of empowering us to try something new. It also triggers our fight-or-flight response, making rash decisions look more appealing than they normally would. 

It’s a constant battle between not pushing enough and pushing too far. The smallest situations can lead to the greatest transitions since habits are built one step, one day, and one action at a time. 

Signed, 

Jessica Marie