I consider myself pretty confident, especially when it comes down to today’s definitions of insecure. I don’t necessarily compare myself to the IG thooters of the world, nor do I look at the nice things people on TikTok or YouTube have in their homes with an eye of jealousy. I don’t want to change my hair, or my skin tone, or even who I am deep down. The only crack in my armor comes from overanalyzing social situations with others. 

When in a group of people, I prefer to sit back and listen more than I speak primarily because it takes me sooo long to get my point across. I can tell mid statement the exact moment when someone loses interest in what I’m saying. I can also tell when someone is losing their patience while listening to me stutter along. 

Over my 25 years of living, the gift of gab doesn’t come easily for me. I often feel awkward when carrying on conversations of small talk that goes beyond surface topics. However, I do pride myself in my ability to pay attention to details in others’ lives and ask questions accordingly. If someone mentions that they are trying a new hobby, I do a pretty decent job of actually remembering to ask more details to form a deeper connection. 

I sometimes wonder if I am actually an effective communicator like I think I am. Sentences form much more succinct and straight to the point in my head but come out of my mouth garbled and indecipherable. I usually have to stop and restart to get things out the best way possible. 

While it’s definitely a thing, I try not to dwell on it. Ultimately, that’s one of the quirks that make me, me. I’ve learned to push forward in making sure I don’t just drop what is important for me to say all because I get scared no one is actually paying attention. Krissy has done a great job helping me understand that my voice is important not just in our relationship, but in all aspects of my life.  

Signed, 

Jessica Marie